instructions on never falling out of love by Inzhuna, literature
Literature
instructions on never falling out of love
invent countless scenarios where pieces
fall into places and you fall into
his arms.
rip your chest up with bitten nails,
scourge your insides with laser-sharp
self-homing
precision-guided missiles
of unending scrutiny:
what's missing, what's missing,
what's missing.
discard fictions, soft-spoken and faceless.
you've met the real deal
and he doesn't want you.
write songs, write
this poem,
write, sing, remember
old melodies
of the broken loves of your youth.
tell yourself every bit of pain that had
passed through you before
carved a perfect spot
for this love to fill.
tell yourself, you loved him before you met him.
what you've learnt to
the day i watched you walk away i bought a knife.
see, you got under my skin and i wanted to
cut you out from under it.
the day you wrapped your hand around my heart
and squeezed in places where i'd shown you it would hurt most
i got to use the knife but all i did was
bleed.
they say to turn the other cheek but i've already turned
enough of myself to you.
i wanted to make you turn instead.
i wanted to sneak past your every wall like i let you sneak
past mine;
i wanted to get under your skin and wrap myself around your veins,
fit myself in hollow places inside your ribcage,
make it hard to breathe,
be the lump in your throat, be the sores on